Yes, folks, it's the small print that will fuck you everytime. And don't be dismayed at my language. It's a sign of the times. FUNNY OR DIE has a bold headline subject today that defies my imagination. And maybe yours too. Here it is: JUSTIN TRUDEAU GIVES GREAT CUNNILINGUS. Just say hello to another porn site.
But in all fairness, I recently asked my urologist if it is possible to get lockjaw from too much cunnilingus. He said "anything is possible." But when I asked my heart surgeon what to do with a six hour erection, he just laughed. I guess doctors do have a good sense of humor.
Let's get back to the small print. Every offer on a website has the necessary disclaimer in small print to protect their asses from litigation. Why? Because most sale pitches are flawed, deceptive and downright dishonest. I would say 99.9% are sucker traps. Once you order and disclose your credit or debit card, you are hooked and will be fucked on a monthly basis.
So, join the club. It's not exactly the Mile High one where you have sex in a toilet on the airplane. That activities is designated mostly for celebrities riding in First Class. Not you, strapped in the middle of a three-seater like a salami, with an unruly kid behind you kicking the seat.
I detest the computer ads that chide me for leaving the page. Or darken my screen with a drop down message that pleads for me to reconsider my decision not to buy a stupid product or mundain service. Don't even think about asking how I ever wanted to visit these disingenuous pages. Perhaps I do need anger management. I'll think about it.
My message for this blog is: DON'T FALL FOR THE SUCKER TRAPS. DELETE, DELETE, DELETE. And may you all have a nice day.
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