I'm talking about the
football field. When I see a bushy tailed running back, and he's tackled by his
hair, that should be the same penalty as grabbing a face mask. Fifteen
yards. But it's not. Nor would it
be illegal to grab a linebacker by his pubic hair. Or if your hand slipped down
to his member, what about that hold?
Perish the thought
you got tangled up in his jockstrap and propelled him into the corporate seats
on the 50 yard line. Especially if he landed on a dowager’s lap. Wait. That’s it. More
money for the team’s owners selling a few minutes of lap dancing in the stands.
They won't go for
such bawdy business. Selling beer and hot dogs at outrageous prices is
reprehensible enough, not to mention the high cost of tickets, parking your car and souvenirs for the kids.
Win or lose, football is a Cash Cow for the stadium owners.
So let's get back to
banning bushy hair on players,
handle bar moustaches and long eye lashes that can be combed back to resemble
a hairy head. Enough is enough. Are you listening, National Football League?
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